A Time of Loneliness, and Discovery:The Pandemic’s Long-Distance Run
Sarah Lyall, writing in The New York Times recently, noted that the long-term stress of the past year had created a state of lassitude and forgetfulness in the millions of us ungrounding from our "normal" lives. Forming memories and formulating plans are equally difficult in this state, as is finding the way to be joyful and energetic.
I loved this article, as it answered a question that has been on my mind: Why are so many people I know feeling miserable?
I also have ideas for how to manage what she describes so precisely. We have a combination of several challenges that, taken together, create the "loneliness of the long-distance runner."
The first challenge we'll call the "finish line" problem. A colleague of mine, Rebecca Jordan-Young, wrote a book about testosterone. In the course of her research, she met a lot of world-class athletes. She learned that the hardest aspect of a race for sprinters to master was to aim to run past the finish line. Otherwise, if they thought the finish line was the goal, they'd slow down and add seconds to their time. We can see the finish line out ahead – tantalizing us – but we have to aim past that point. Because we aren't finished with the work of this pandemic until we've rebuilt the country.
The second challenge we'll call the "depletion" problem. Too much stress depletes many parts of the endocrine system and leaves us weak. We have nothing left for the ongoing stress. This is a time when people fall apart, both mentally and physically. This is compounded by the finish line problem -- we can't just stop just yet.
The third challenge we'll call the "loneliness" problem. This year of sheltering in place has left us very lonely, not just for hugs from loved ones, but for the general feeling of the madding crowd. The frenzy of people bustling through the train station or shopping on Main Street is a feeling that echoes deeply in the human soul and which we have missed enormously. Our offices we might eschew, but a ballgame would be great about now.
How do these three problems come together to offer us a way forward? It makes me think of the 1962 British film, The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner. It is the story of a teen rebel, ready to pay the price to defy authority. What comes to mind, at this moment, are the scenes of the hero running through the countryside – just alone.
In long-distance running there are moments of profound exhaustion. One hits a wall, as we all have at this moment – and one has to run through such moments. The image of that young man running and running is comforting to me. And, I know from the film, he finds strength in running. It's this that is part of the solution. We can connect with the strength that gets called up by this kind of trek.
We also have to respect the depletion of our stress management systems. For those of us in North America, we are in luck, because the sun is rising and the days are getting longer. Get out and get some sun. Dig in some dirt, even if it's just a pot. Feel the wind. Commune with the insects that are waking up after a long sleep.
Finally, forget whatever you're thinking about "this will be over." If there was ever a time to keep it in the day, it's this time. Getting into this mess was very fast, but getting out will be much slower – more like evolution than revolution.
A long-distance run is a time of altered consciousness, it's a time of stress, and it's a time of loneliness. What the film reveals to us is that it's also a time of discovery. The hero of the film is able to use the challenges of the long-distance run to get perspective on his life and he uses that knowledge to come to a decision; he refuses to comply with authority, despite the personal cost. I'm not advocating that as a choice, I'm just saying that percolating in each of us on this particular ultra-marathon is some precious knowledge about life that will help as we enter the "what next?"
Don't miss the chance to hear what the universe is telling you about running a great race. It might not be the answer you expect, but it will be the right answer for your life. Enjoy the run!
Mindy Thompson Fullilove, MD, is a professor of urban policy and health at The New School. This is a slightly condensed version of an essay that first appeared in April 2021 on her blog, Countdown to Main Street.
Photo by Manfred Antranias Zimmer from Pixabay